When all else fails, PUNT !

As a young lad, I was never enamored by the great football position players of the era. To me Joe Montana was an ok quarterback, Lawrence Taylor was an average defensive guy, Franco Harris was a fine running back but for me the most interesting position players were the kickers. Seems weird since I can't kick a lick. My soccer skills are worse than a 6 year olds. My kickball kicks (even to this day) usually burn the ground and never go where I intend them to go. I remember kicking off the ball in some pick up football games in the park, if one in ten made it into the air, we had success. I am sure it wasn't normal to have bruises on your feet after attempting to punt a few down the field. What the matter with me feet? I can kick a tennis ball real good after a bad shot and I can keep a balloon afloat with my feet for minutes on end. It boggles my mind.

Back to the kickers of the NFL.
Garo Yepremian of the Dolphins was a favorite of mine. Until he decided to throw the ball.

I loved Jack Dempsey, dude had half a foot and still holds the record for longest field goal (40 something years by now)

The all-time favorite player of mine will always be Dave Jennings of the New York Giants. As a twelve year old, I sent him some letters. OK, about 20. I asked him tons of questions about punting, to describe his practices and most importantly for some tips on how to become a good punter or did he ever get scared of on coming lineman? To my surprise, boy was I every time I went to the mail box to find letter from the the NY Giants addressed to me. He was thoughtful enough to answer this punk kids questions with great detail and care. I think by my third letter he may have thought that I was out of for his job. He always included signed photos and some sort of Giants stickers or some of his cards. He was like my pen pal for a whole season. Thinking back on it, knowing that the kickers in the game today still don't get the respect from their peers (Ray Guy , still not in the hall.)I may have been the only kid writing to a punter. Ever.
FYI- I still have the letters and give them a read through every so often.
That my friends, takes me back.

So for all those watching the game this weekend. I ask you to give some time to observing the under-appreciated kicking game. When your punter rips one for 59 yeards with no return. You will have witnessed something special.



the sportsfreaks code:
its an Uncle right to kick his nephews in the pants an unlimited amount of times.
I know its not always funny.. nah.. its always funny.

I had hours of fun throwing the baseball off the cement base of the house to practice fielding grounders. To be as good as Willie Randolph you had to practice, practice, practice you know. Unfortunately my aim was not very good as I proceeded to break most of bottom shingles off the house with my throws. I'm sure my Pop was thrilled.

Us neighborhood kids had some epic wiffle ball games there. It was no holds barred when we played. You would think that playing with a wiffle ball and bat you we safe from breaking things and each other. Think again. Getting hit with a WF bat hurts like the dickens and did you ever get your finger caught in the ball. Everything STOPS! to surgically remove your pinched finger. But you did run around with the ball dangling from your finger to show it joyfully to everyone playing how you caught it.The yard definitely took it hard during those games. Fences were ran into, precious flower blooms were ripped from their stems in order to stay on base and moms new mulching jobs provided some tough footing during those sky high pop ups.
Hey Dad, muchas gracias for mowing the field (lawn), we were sliding an extra two or three feet just because of that.


I can't remember how this game came to be in the yard but it was fantastic.It's tough to describe, I'm sure may have been a tennis device for practice. The tennis ball was attached to a cord and it spun up and down along the metal screw top. Anyone? Help with a name? I told you it was tough to describe.Boy oh boy did we practice, we practiced so hard on that thing we broke the wire the ball was attached to. Lots of frustration was taken out on that poor thing. I'm sure it was probably happy to die.

Our parents must have really thought us kids were nuts. We would have relay races between the neighbors four yards. We'd have to navigate six fences, four gates one or two dogs, cars in driveways, Damn.. we'd be running across lawns, flower beds (good short cuts), clothes lines, sprinklers and sunbathers. That is when I got most use of my "stop watch" option on my watch (that was a quick shout out to my Facebook friends). I even used my pops old hand held stop watch at the time. Gotta get me one of those again. I got some nephews and nieces who are just like we used to be and would do anything to get timed.


there's Mom's whistle, the sportsfreaks got to go.

Four-ty ! (Degrees)

Last week I was prompted to play a round of golf by a few of the guys at the office. We took off from work for a day of golf that we soon would never forget. We heard about this golf course is South Lake County, FL that was offering free "winter" golf to all golfers. For real, dude. The only criteria for golfers was, they had to dress in their finest Florida summer clothes. This seemed like the best deal ever until you realize it was forecast to be only 41 degrees that day with a windchill factor in the low 30's. Certainly not the balmy Florida weather us sports are used to.
So donned with my flip flops, white shorts (did someone say white out?), polo shirt , shades and Gator Cap I set forth to meet up with the guys at 6:45am. Wouldn't you know it we had one guy, faking sick, who would not be joining us (FYI Andrew, we know where you live.)

To all you Northerner's, 30 something degrees down here is not a good thing. We got thin blood . Really we do. So to say it was cold was an understatement. If I could've stayed in my car with heater on while driving the the cart path I would have. But nooooo..the golf course had a few tricks up their sleeves for all those who ventured out for this special deal. We had a use a golf cart. An open air golf cart! The mere thought of driving faster to finish the round quicker quickly went away when hit with the extra cold wind it created. The crazy cart girls (those beeotches, in their thermals) were of no help. They were only serving frosty beverages (beer me!). You were not able to leave the course for any reason. But they did have Icee machines on holes 5 and 14 for those trying to keep cool. I ventured for cherry. Delicious. aaahhh Brain Freeze!

During the turn was our only reprieve from the elements. You had 15 minutes. (can you believe the bastards timed us) to warm up in the clubhouse. I'll be honest, it was the most glorious 15 minutes of my life. Then it was back out into the frozen tundra. Of all the days for the sun to be shy. This was getting worse by the minute.

To say I shot bad was an understatement. How does one stay relaxed and focused while shivering to death? My stupid chicken skin had goose bumps.

My favorite vision for the day was a foursome we passed that had painted the letters G-O-L-F on their bare chests. All you football fans think you so bad ass. HA!

In the end, with rosy cheeks and runny noses we said our good byes.
The sportsfreak enjoyed his day just being one of the guys.

The Young Ones

Who says that you can never start playing sports too early?
The past few weeks I have been lucky enough to have been a witness to, as well as a participant in a few sporting events that I will tell you about in this and future blogs.

As I walked to my assigned court I could feel my stomach getting tighter and tighter as I got closer to the gate leading to the court. I never felt like this ever in all my years of playing tennis. But today was a different day, today was the first day that I would be teaching tennis to a court full of 5 year olds. The Tot-Tennis Training Program as they call it, surely could not be that hard right? When I signed up to teach the class I was sure that I could do this with my eyes closed. I love to play tennis. I love the whole playing with anyone who wants to enjoy the sport as much as I do. This was a no brainer. But when I opened the the gate and ten little sets of wide eyes turned my way. It was, I'll admit, a little scary.
After introducing myself (FYI- Mr.Ray is much easier for the kiddos than Mr. Kubicsko) to the kids and their parents, we got down to business of having some fun. For some of the kids this was the first time on the court, much less knowing anything about how to play tennis. So our goal this day was just to introduce themselves to their racquets, the tennis balls and the court. Pink racquets for the girls and blue ones for the boys. Even kids know that! The dumping of 200 tennis balls on the court was a hit. Lots of giggles and laughing as they scrambled to pick them all up. One little girl said they felt soft like her bunny rabbit. I'll remember that one to ease the tension the next time I'm serving for a match. For some cardio, I started them marching around the lines of the court single file, then a little faster and then to an all out sprint. At that point I had to slow it down because of some kids were stumbling, bumbling, berman style. We then visited the "net". Why is it so high? Was one of the questions I got. Won't the ball go through the holes in the net? was another winner.


At the end of the first class I had 10 happy students and one even happier Coach.


Coach Sportsfreaks methods are mysterious.

Pick Me ! Pick Me !

Last week I signed up for friendly tennis tournament, signing up about 1.5 hours before the event. Warmed up relaxed and feeling loose for my match, time comes to play. Ray is not listed to participate. What?!! 64 players signed up. I know I signed up. But to no avail, I was the 65th. The Tennis Nazi announces "NO TENNIS FOR YOU!". Not sure how this could have happened, but it did. So as respectful as I could be leaving the court, I hit a ball over the fence, took my racket and went home. I think Johnny Mac would have asked me for a bit more.

I haven't felt that slighted since finding raisins in my Trick or Treat bag.

A close 2nd was last month when a guy at the Y decided he didn't want me as his 5th for a game. (Me? I'm channeling Kiki Vandeweghe, his loss.). Got him back when he asked me this week to play so he could get a run in and I told him I was not interested. Loving every minute of him sitting on the bleachers as I drained a few more practice shots. Karma!



Ultimate slights:

Being the last pick in dodge ball- if you wore glasses it was an automatic.

Having a girl being picked before you (a boy!). Boy o boy , have you got problems.

66th best college basketball team. So the teams record is 14-17. It still hurts.

Having your High-Five attempt go un-recognized. There is no smooth way to bring your arm back down and hope that no one saw you get dissed.


Even the elite of sports have their own ways of telling players about their shortcoming but try to say it in the nicest ways possible.

He is a "grinder" or "scrappy" player= fields his position...can't hit worth a damn.

That player has "intangibles" = very smart...not very talented.

A fine "complimentary" player =
you want to be a.. your never going to be a...you never were a... STAR.

A "Serviceable" big man = you take up space nicely.

A "Smart" base runner = if you run any slower, you will go backwards.

A "Utility" man = 10 more years of playing for 10 more teams around the league.

A "Middle Relief Man"= pitchers purgatory.
Can't go more than 3 1/3 in a start.. can't close a close one.




the sportsfreak WANTS YOU to keep reading!

Sing-A-Long

It's time for the sportsfreak sing-a-long.
This weeks title: The Adams Family theme song

Snap Snap

Snap Snap

There's Yogi and there's Mickey,
Mattingly and Reggie,
And don't forget about Joe D,
The Yankees Family.

Their house is a museum
Where people come to see 'em
4 million like to scre'am
The Yankees Family.

Clete
Sweet(Lou)
Pettite

Now we have twenty seven
Sending our prayers to heaven
Champions in twenty eleven
The Yankees Family


Snap Snap

Snap Snap

Get a Grip Already

We've all been there right? The first time that you accidentally lose the handle of the bat during a swing and the bat is on its own into the wild blue yonder.
Some emotions/questions are sure to go through your mind when it happens, my first reaction was fear (is it going to hit someone/something, amazement (look at that trajectory), excited (its spun around 18 freaking times), calmness (how long has it been up there), global (thinking about Australia for some reason), pain (as it hits the ground), sadness (I'm sorry bat, I let you slip out of my hands)

I love it when a bat goes into the stands, now I don't want people to get hurt, but for me, it's one of the most exciting "all for yourselves" scenarios. As soon as the bats is in the air... some fans are getting into the fetal position, some diving behind loved ones (Sorry honey), a few are running up the stairs to get away or those who were on their phones, are bracing for the pain.
There's always one moron, who stands amongst the rest of us cowards and has to try and catch the damn thing. For some reason, he never catches it as cool as we thought he might catch it, right? It's not like he'll snare it blindfolded while holding a baby. He usually makes it with the awkward two handed body catch while saving it with his leg before it hits the ground. Then he'll thrust it in the air, so all of us can applaud. Not so smooth my friend.

Did you ever use pine tar?
I tried it once. No help with my hitting and it took a jar of Lava to get the crap off my hands.

Wearing gloves to the plate? You're a Momma's Boy!!

I swear to god I am shrinking. (As a man , does that sound bad?)
When I started playing tennis the racket grip was a 4 as I grew to an adult, a 4 1/2,then as time went by, a 4 1/4, now at the ripe age of 43 it's a 4.

Badminton- do I have lady hands? I am likin' the 3 3/4 grip.
The racket is like a whip!

To bowl or not to bowl with a glove is the question?
If you bowl with a glove.. Your a dick!

To bring you non-bowlers up to speed on bowling accessories,
Bowling has fingerless gloves... My guess is its for those going to play handball after.

They have fancy white gloves. Hey idiot, you're bowling, not playing golf.

The black half glove where it cut off at the knuckles.
Never sure what that was supposed to help you with.

Bowling has cyborg appendages for your hand and wrist that promised life-like ball control (hey Kirschenbaum !, that didn't work for you dude, but your #1)

I tried them all. Still feel like a jerk thinking they'd help my game.




Do as the others do and stick with the sportsfreak.

Remember to Use Protection

An NBA owner being fined talking about players reminds me of how the NFL has been protecting its Quarterbacks. It has gotten out of hand. The NBA is really saying " Shut Up and Play" to all their players/coaches/owners. We, the fans, and the media clamour for personalities in all sports. We love our TO's, our 85's(no habla espanol), our AI's, and our Manny's being Manny. I couldn't imagine how boring our leagues would be without them. We have enough company men playing our sports.
I say let the players be themselves. Loosen the leash guys. (Marc Cuban agrees with me)

I picked up an old catchers mask at the flea market last month. Had to hide it from another buyer (forgot da moolah in da car). Leather wrapped around a metal frame. Not much to it. I now have more respect for the catchers of those days. They had to be tough. Now you just have to be related to a Molina to play catcher.

When I first started playing baseball , I was excited to get my first full uniform. I finally made it from the T shirts to the real uniform. New to me, but not everyone else is that I had to now go out and get myself a athletic cup/supporter. "Can't play with the big boys if you don't protect your boys" is what the coach told us.
Going to the store and buying was a different story. I died of embarrassment because my mom was with me and, like I'm sure, everyone in the store knew I was buying this damn thing. I could hear the in store annoucement coming " We need a price check on a Jr size (ahem..make that large) athletic supporter at register 2".
Truth be damned...I never wore the stupid thing. I, as do my nuggets, thank the lucky stars that I never even had a close call.

Quote that should be on all athletic supporter boxes.
"with your cup, comes great responsibility."


I love Nascar's fire "retardant' uniforms. Shouldn't these guys wear these things everywhere they go? Who knows when a hot cup of McDonald's coffee may fall in their lap. Another reason is because it's the only way the people will recognize some of these faceless drivers. Living up North we got a paragraph a week about the race.Down South its a different story. People got driver pics in their wallets. The truth is now I can recognize 15 to 20 of theses guys. Hey, living in the south changes a man. Jeff Gordon rules!!! Did you know he is like 4'11' a tiny, tiny, tiny man.



The sportsfreak's gotta go work on his tan.
My secret...SPF 50

Want to go halfsies ?

As I watch my upteenth football game this weekend I have noticed that I am seeing less and less of a sports tradition that will ultimately be seen only one day a year fi it continues at its currentpace. I am talking about "the Half Time Show". After shoveling as much sports info into my head as humanly possible, the last thing I want to see during Half Time are highlights and breakdown of the game I was just watching.

I tend to lean toward the side of traditionalist when it comes to my sports. It was traditionally the Half Time show where I could sit back and see the home school marching band perform, as well as proudly show to a nation their school spirit.
I was always amazed by the band spelling out their schools name while playing.
Still am. Go FAMU Rattlers!

I wish to reclaim "Half Time" for all fans. Sure the fans at the game get some of this authentic "Half Time" but us suckers at home get a "Network Half Time Show"
How many gecko commercials can one person stand?

Sure we get an occasional look at the fans at the game when the teams score, but in comparison, we get far too many views of players spitting or coaches just standing.
Would it kill the TV guys to show more of the games fanaticals for more than 2 seconds. Some of us go through hours and hours of preparation to create our look for the game.What better time to showcase some of them than at Half Time? Seems like a no brainer to me.

Some newcomers to the NCAA Football and season have a lot to learn about school traditions that are dear to the schools faithful. Where better to learn about hook'em horns and how to rock them correctly. Or why a wild buffalo tears across the field during a score or why cannons are fired after a team scores or why we see cheerleaders doing push ups after the home team scores. The die-hards and alumni may know everything about their schools trads but a newby needs info and lots of it.
The networks need to think about keeping traditions alive a bit longer. If you could hear the Tennessee faithful, all 100,000 of them, singing Rocky Top you might be so overwhelmed with emotions you never knew you had, you might ditch your team to be a Vol for life.


Another area for TV to look to enlighten the nation is the Student Sections. The kids there are insane, not matter what school, plain insane. They love there school and boy do they have the spirit in them (yes some of those spirits too, you know what I mean).The students have their own traditions that we the public rarely see. Unusual, pregame rituals (Paterno-Ville), in game trad (ND's waving keys or Maryland's newspaper reading) and post game salutes.(WV singing Country Roads).
Before going to a game, be prepared, know them, be one with the students.


So if you feel as though the traditions of your school are somehow slowly being forgotten by the TV networks, so be sure to tell ,show, re-enact them to someone, anyone, everyone new to the fabulously insane world of college football.


the sportsfreak will see you "the Half"

Working On Working Out

I want to work out. Honestly I do. I just can't bring myself to do it the traditional way... by going to the gym. I never bought into the whole of idea of it. I did try for a solid 16 1/2 months. I lived the gym rats dream, going after work 3-4 times a week religiously. In the beginning, I had the mandatory trainer guide me through the workouts. That basically sucked! FYI-A grown man should not have to cry in front of his trainer. But things happen. After probation I had full run of the place. So I did as many as 50 people did every time they visited with me to this glorious place. I planted myself on a treadmill and watched a movie. Yes they had a movie theatre in the gym! Working out Schworking Out! Pass the Popcorn!
I first walked, then jogged, then ran to my hearts content while watching the Rocky Five-ology or the Bourne Identity Three-ology. Please let it be known that even though I only visited the theatre during my workouts, they had treadmills, bikes, elliptical machine, stair master etc, so I was a master of all by the time my sentence was up. I don't think I ever saw Gold Gym rep in that theatre, maybe we were in solitary confinement and we really didn't know it. So to all my fellow gym(nasts)who were pumping iron or working on the lat machine or the demonic ab crunching machine, I enjoyed our time together(albiet segregated).

So now I use the old fashion method of working out by just playing sports I like. Its a simple theory really, instead of riding the a bike inside, I ride it outside. Instead of a stair master, I do a hundred layups. Playing Tennis for a few hours, a couple days a week instead of an aerobics class.

I stumbled upon a revolutionary way to keep in shape this past month.
And for just 3 easy payments of $19.95 I will let you in on my secret.
But since you are friends of the sportsfreak, I will let you slide.

I call it "The Free For All, Away from it All" 7 day workout
This workout was inspired by my family from LI visiting me this past summer.

New Workout Equipment: Emily 8, Eric 10 and Joey 10
Slightly Used Equipment: Fran (45), Moms (70) and Pops (70)

Exercise #1: Swimming
I was told I would be having to swim 21 total hours, well not really swimming, it was just throwing the kids around in the pool. It sorta went like this:
Em 50 pounds lift and throw. Eric 80 pounds lift and throw. Joey 100 pounds lift and throw. Sort of like the clean and jerk lifts minus the clean.
Three sets of ten and I was done.
Got a new training method for Michael Phelps, that would be to have some kids sit on his back while swimming, it ain't easy Mikey.

Exercise #2: Water Park
Ok, my Pops are I were thinking this is going to be day of fun and sun, a little relaxing lazy river riding with a tube ride or two. Not happening says the kiddos. The stupid lazy river was not lazy and not relaxing, how can you relax with 3 kids all riding the 5 mile an hour current in three different tunnels and spray areas. God, I was so happy to see the end of the ride. Yet the kids convinced me to go two more rounds.
Hey Pops, thanks for bringing up the rear (100 yards behind!)
You were a huge help.(these are the sarcastic italics)

Exercise #3: Climbing the Human Jungle Gym
Uncle Ray was the Human Jungle Gym.
Monkey Joe, Monkey Emily and Monkey Eric took turns trying to break the jungle gym. Understand people, that the Jungle Gym is 43 years old, the jungle gym looks brand new, but is still 43 years old. All in all, The Jungle Gym would not trade his time with the monkeys for anything.

Exercise #4: The Mount Dora Death March
This is an exercise I wouldn't wish on my Mother. Wait..this exercise was led by my Mother. All I can say folks is... Mt.Dora ...August... Hot...Wet... A little boring says the kids. Did I mention it was hot and wet? If you can complete one set a year there, you got me beat.
P.S. Mommy, your favorite loves Mt.Dora, don't tell the others.


The worst part of the workout was coming at the end of the week.
I would not have my equipment(family) there to continue my workouts.

They always say you should workout with a workout buddy.

I was lucky enough to have six of them.

All the sportsfreaks love
Miss you guys

We can only dream

Ok freaks, we are heading to the land of make believe and searching for some dream pitching match ups/ battery mates/ teammates that we would have like to seen on the field together. When I watch a game, its a small thing like a play on the players names that make a lasting memory of that game, not the guys who grounded out to second. So its with a little tongue in cheek I give you some of my favorites I've seen or dreamt of.



phil COKE vs john SMILEY
You'll have the whole world smiling with you during this game.



colter BEAN(s) vs jim RICE
"Everybody sing now!"
Red beans and rice, red beans and rice, red beans and rice, make everything nice.
Red beans and rice, red beans and rice, red beans and rice, I could eat a plate twice.
So nice, nice, nice.


bud BLACK vs vida BLUE
The 330 wins between them surely bruised some opposing players egos.


dan QUISENBERRY vs darryl STRAWBERRY
You can order a Quisenberry Quench or a Strawberry Beach smoothie from Tropical Smoothie. Refreshing and good for you too! Enjoy !


jim LYTTLE relay throw to roy SMALLEY
It's a "little" bit of a stretch, sue me.


bill SHORT vs terrance LONG .
Talk about a Short career 5-11 era 4.73 Long came up short on promise.


Josh BOOTY vs ralph GARR
It's a shame neither played for the Pirates.


tim RAINES vs curt FLOOD
Tim was a natural at stealing bases. Curt opened the 'gates' of Free Agency


ernie BANKS vs don MONEY
It was money in the bank that when opening a pack of Topps cards in 1978 and always getting Two Don Money cards and no Reggie Jacksons. I was not a happy 11 year old.



PABLO torrealba vs jose ESCOBAR
You'd have to be on drugs to know anything about these players careers.
Pablos 1979 Topps card looks like he's been arrested.










purnal GOLDY vs don LOCKS
If you were alive in the 60's you were lucky enough to see these guys play.
Purnal was not beary good, he played only one year.



the sportsfreak wishes you sweet baseball dreams.
G'nite Freaks.

Random Moments to Reflect on

Walker Cooper, outfielder in 43' World Series, held a ticket in his uniform pocket that he had left for his dad for him to attend the game. Sadly his Dad passed away before the previous game. He instructed the ushers not to have any one sit in that seat, Walker felt his Dad would still want to watch from his seat.


After striking out in a softball game, I was told this by a teammates 6 year old son "its ok.. you swung as hard as you could."


Laying on center court, waiting for the last run of the night.
1:30 AM 07/05/10 Clermont,FL


Not being able to dunk anymore...sigghh.


Seeing a childs face light up the instant a balloon is handed to him/her.


How lonely a baseball mitt looks without a ball.


Never..ever.. pick up a sports page left in a bathroom stall.


Shooting free throws into the sunset.


Hitting the sweet spot is truly sweet.


Having no one to high five is truly depressing.


Crying everytime the National Anthem is played. American to the core.




To all you sportsfreakaholics, thank you for all the support.

A Hairy Time at the Game

As I watched with crazy happiness as Chris Chambliss rounded the bases after hitting a home run to get the Yankees into the 76 World Series, strangely instead of looking at the him running through the hundreds of fans on the field, I was fixated on Chambliss' helmetless balding head. Being nine years old and having a flowing mane of red hair, I never thought a player to be bald under his helmet. In my mind the helmet just covered their hair and of course they all had hair. Now every time I see the replay of this historic home run I can only think of Chris Chambliss' stupid head.

So now I would like you to take seat, sit up straight and stop fidgeting as I take a look back at some of my most memorable sport stars who've cropped to some serious do's and dont's of the "do" world.

Do be - Oscar Gamble: his hair on his 1974 baseball card is unbelievable.
I'm still not sure how his cap stayed on.

Don't be- Rory McElroy:
an pasty white Irish dude with Mr. Kot-TER's hair.
(That one was from way back freaks, hope you got it.)

Do be - Bronson Arroyo- He's the Goldielocks of the MLB.
He's got the stuff to back up his do.

Don't be- Brian Bozworth- if all you wanted to be remembered for in the sports world is how stupid your hair looked.
Mission accomplished.


Curley Culp- how did I wind up with some many of his football cards?


Shouldn't the NHL be given a major penalty because of the 30 years of mullets.


Do be - Ron Duguay new York Rangers 197O's heartthrob.
Never wore a helmet, as to not mess up his hair.
How many posters of him wound up in girls bedrooms?
The real question is how many girls bedrooms did he wind up in?


Here are a few quick snips before the stylist can see you.

Brutus "the Barber' Beefcake- gave the worst haircuts to the finest of wrestlers.

Jerry Hairston Jr.- he's got his Dad's hair.

Earl Combs- weaved his way through the Yankees outfield to the HOF.

Kyle Bush- dude is bush league. Wreck him in corners 1,2,3 and 4

Tim Crews- he of the classic cut.

Red Schoendeist- all red heads should be Hall of Famers.

The Predator- mad props to the alien who can pull off the dreads.

Fuzzy Zeoller- his brain got a little fuzzy in 1997.

Tom Brady- nice Beiber cut! New England sucks!!

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang- they had a car that flies!

Harry Carey- Ah-one! Ah-two! Ah-Three



the sportsfreaks blog will now fade to black.

Smile for the Press

Is it just me or have sports Press Conferences gone completely overboard.
Message to all media, when your calling a press conference to announce a press conference, it's time to check yourselves.
We have seen the whole spectrum of PC's, from the down right boring to the completely insane. I would not be surprised to hear ESPN is arranging a PC today to announce Billy Fourfingers from Accounts Receivable has been traded to Account Payable.
So here is my take on the medias beloved PC's.


Now we all know how the Yankees of the 70's were hiring and firing managers like crazy with an occasional fight breaking out during these PC's. Did the Yankees have a PC everyday just for the hell of it?
The first real press conference that I fondly remember was of the Dave Winfield signing by the Yankees in 1980. With the enormity of his contract ($23 mill over 10 years) and with his sheer size and charismatic smile, it was a memorable introduction to a city.
To me it was the last great PC.


Why must older players have press conferences when they are joining their new team?

Is it really "breaking news" that David Eckstein is now a member of the Washington Nationals or whatever team his is on right now.
Did the Boston Celtics really need to have a big PC with the signing of Shaq? He is or was a big name in the NBA. But really people, when you are trying to think of a fancy nickname for your newest player you just signed instead of telling us how he will play in your system. You might as well call it day.

Do you think Mike Maddux mailed in his 8th,9th and 10th PC's when he signed with Seattle, Montreal and Houston. They should have just put a cardboard cutout of him with a cartoon cloud that said " I am just happy to be here in..."

My recomendation for the crap listed above:
The MLB/NBA/NHL/NFL should step up and rule that a tweet would be sufficient.


I think the multi-player PC is the unltimate humiliation for at least one of the players. All I can think of is that I don't want to be that guy on the end of the podium wanting to scream to everyone there " Hey I'm gonna play here too!".
No offense AJ Burnett or Chris Bosh, you guys were like the little annoying younger brothers. Just shut up before Lebron /Wade or Texeira/Sabathia beat the crap out of you.


I love the players contract extension signing PC's. It's where the player who thinks he has outperformed his contract and refuses to play until he gets paid because he felt he was underpaid and when he finally get paid tells us, the honest hard working fans, that he did it just for them and the love of the game.
Thanks to 90% of all athletes for being insincere.


When will this joke of the High School Athlete's PC finally end? Do I really need to know that Dirk Youwannabeme in the 10th grade at Windy City Prep thinks he might be willing to play football at Ohio State, but won't sign (It's a full scholarship moron!Just sign the paper!) at this time because he stills want to visit other schools (score with more chicks) but will definitely give his word that he is 87% sure he will commit, that is until his best friend decides to go to another school and he now wants to play with his buddy at Michigan.


Couldn't we place a time restriction on a PC?
How about allowing two minutes max for a Press Conference.
My PC Example:
"I'd like to introduce Bjorn Kickemfar.
He will be the new punter of the NY Jets.
We'll see y'all in training camp. "
How many media freaks will be setting up an all night vigil for that?




Thank you everyone for coming.
The sportsfreak is proud to announce that this PC is OVER!

Come to Your Senses

Touch

I love a dry glove.
I despise a sweaty one, for that I have no love.
A dry baseball, just feel those seams, its gotta good grip.
A wet baseball feels gross, its bound to slip.
A dry basketball means a swish.
A wet basketball feel like a slimy fish.
A dry football produces a perfect spiral.
A wet football touched by everyone is just viral.

Why does touch football always turn into a game of who can touch the hardest?

It's great to hear someone say you have great touch on the tennis court.
Chasing down a drop shot from the baseline, never gonna get there abort! abort!

Hate the touch foul. It goes by the another name "ticky tack".
Overly sweaty dudes on the hoops court.(needing to towel off after every hack)

Fielding Rule #79. Never, ever touch a rolling bunt down the line.

Swing and have the ball hit on the label of the bat.
Pain like you never felt.

Using a wood bat feels like baseball.
Using aluminum bat feels like cheatin y'all.



Taste

Sports stuff I have licked/tasted over 42 years. Mom,please turn away at this time.
My baseball glove (I swallowed bits of it too).
Wooden bat (for luck).
Baseballs (too many to count)
Wiffleball & bat.
Football. Tennis Ball. Volleyball. Ping pong ball (covered in beer).
Bowling ball(turned tongue black).
Handball wall (hiding from Port Jeff Police).
Horseshoe. Ping pong paddle. Tennis racket (wood,metal,graphite).
Fishing pole (salty). A few baseball fences.
High School track (face plant-ouchy).
High jump mat (never could land right).
Bingo card at the swim club(sue me,I was 8).
My little red sled (slowest sled ever made).
OK...time for my annual tetanus shot.


Hearing

"you ain't hearing, if you ain't listening."
He no batta he no batta, swing batta.
I'm open !
Swish!
Brick!
Your the rock, I'm the stick, at the mailbox go deep and I'll hit you.
Keep your head down, hands up, head up, step into it,
Bend your knees.
Just put your face in the water.
Keep your eye on the ball.
Put it between the arrows,
Dig!
Good dig!
It's in the pocket.
Man Up!
Shirts or skins?


Smell

Freshly cut baseball field grass.
Stinky socks after playing all day.
New can of tennis balls.
My glove.
Those overly sweat dude from above.


Sight

"You see what you want to see."
Coach Richie hitting thee highest fly balls ever.
A true single to center.
Dragging baseball bats behind us on the way home.
Sliding your mitt to the fat end of the bat.
Sideline bomb to Wesley Walker.
Shooting the rock while the sun blinds you (please go in)
Athletes smiling- that's when they are just boys playing a game.
Getting a final run in just before sunset.





"I think we are done here" the sportsfreak feels it.

A Warped Kind of Day

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale
a tale of a Awesome trip,
that started from this tropic state,
aboard the Warped Tour ship.
The mate (that's me) was a mighty wailin' man,
the Skipper not so brave that's for sure,
10,000 kids and I set sail that day,
for a 10 hour Warped Tour,
a 10 hour Warped Tour.

The mosh pits started getting rough,
this tiny Dude was tossed.
If not for the liquid courage of the Monsters brew.
Your Dude would be lost.
Your Dude would be lost.

The Tour ran aground on the land of the Central Florida Fairgrounds
with Ray(again),
the Strippers too.
The Stoner and his boys,
70 rock stars,
the weird dressers and a Green Man,
here on Warped Tour Isle.

So this is the tale of our Warped-aways,
they'll be rocking for a long long time.
They have to make the best of things,
it's been a fucking great time.
The dude Ray and his 10000 friends too
will do their very best,
to make their day tolerable,
in their Warped Tour Island mess.
No shade ,no TP, no cold water,
not a single luxury
like Robinson Crusoe
it was primitive as can be.
So join us here each year my friends,
you're sure to get a little high,
from ten thousand and one Warped-aways
here on Warped Tour Isle.


On this years episode I thought I would give you the highlights and lowlights of the event as seen through the eyes and mind of the sportsfreak. Yikes!

To the younger generation (nancy boys) who came for the tour to take in the sunshine and some great bands, but wound up instead scurrying for cover in the shaded areas behind the concession stands because the sun was too "shiny".
Suck it Up!
Wouldn't you think they be training for this day? Ahhh...Youth.


Warped Survival Tip #1 - coat thyself with sunscreen, you will be baking for 8 hours.

What is worn to Warped is a shock to some and normal to others. You had your bikini wearers both good and bad. Dudes in speedos and flip flops, one guy in a suit and tie (don't let that fool you, that guy was raging!), saw two clowns, a girl with horsehair leg warmers,I saw eight black people (where are my brothers?), a dude in army fatigues, lots of spiked mohawks, red hair, blue hair, green hair, rainbow bright hair and two people with walkers.

Warped Survival Tip #2- Keep your head on a swivel if your rockin' the yellow. Wearing yellow means you've made yourself a target: I had numerous water bottles, countless flip flops, one strawberry shake, an orange vuvuzela, a condom water balloon and a dirty sneaker come my way.


DouchebagLand or as you may refer to it, the Mosh Pit is all fun and games until your get run over. The MP really is like a twister. The outer circle of DB's picking off people as the circle gets larger and larger, you are now part of the twister, things are flying around, body parts get hit, you feel something wet, taste something sweet, your are blind to everything until your get to the vortex of the tornado. There at the storms center it's uniquely silent and everyone is at peace. You can't stay there forever, so leave your center.... carnage awaits.

Warped Survival Tip #3- if someone has "Free Hugs" or "Free Kisses" written on them. It is not ok to just run up and hug or kiss them. Who knew?

Man can not survive on bread alone. Warped people like myself go another route altogether. I am going to list exactly what I consumed so that historians can document it for medical study.
In time order, here....we....go...2 liters of water and blueberry muffin(waiting in line to enter), once inside monster ED, monster ED, monster ED (they were free), liter of water, liter of water, liter of water, liter of water, PB&J sandwich,($12 for chicken fingers no thanks),liter of water, liter of water, monster ED, PB&J sandwich, beer, liter of water, liter of water, bag of bottle caps,liter of water,liter of water,liter of water,liter of water, monster ED (half drank, thrown from a stage, still it was cold),liter of water,liter of water, monster nitro, monster nitro.

Warped #4 Tip- Stoners will share their weed dude! It's ok, I got a medical thing.


Awesome bands to get into your Ipods-
WATIC,Andrew WK, Suicide Silence, Dirty Little Rabbits, Sum 41



Thanks to the guy who parked his bicycle under my car.
Free bike for the sportsfreak!

Let's Get Cookin'

I wish I could cook. Really cook. I have some general meals that I feel comfortable cooking and people will actually eat. Me, I loves me a good meatloaf , whip up a mean spanish potato omelet or work a can opner to death by making a veggie bean chili. Beyond that I am totally clueless. Using a recipe does me no good. The description of the meal sounds wonderful and the pictures of the entrees look amazing, but when they ask me for a "pinch of sassafras or smidge of dryed onion root" I lose my mind. Who has these ingredients on hand? I'm a dude for christ sakes!

Men have been told since childbirth the bqq is the mans domain.
Fire + meat = Man!
Then why I am always a little anxious when I start up the BBQ. I think I know I know what I am supposed to do. I press the red button and hope for fire. No fire and I am shoving matches into the back of bbq like I'm violating the poor thing. After blindly lighting some 15 matches and throwing them at the bbq, PRESTO! we have fire. Then and only then, do I feel like I escaped a fiery death one more time. I want to be the chef, the one flips the 5lb steak to create flash flame that singes the roof tops but have the look of wanted to do that. Chicks dig big flames! (that sounds kinda gay doesn't it?)I love the smokey smells of the bbq & I get to enjoy a beer or two or three. I get it, I dig the whole experience but the bbq never does.
As I see it, the bbq and I have an gentlemans arrangement.
I bring the bbq fresh meat every summer and he burns it.
See....gentlemanly.


Throughout sports many an athlete has a name that make us think of our favorite foods.

Chili Davis- used to think he ate chili everyday before games. I thought I read it on the back of his baseball card. Never could find which card. Maybe I was mistaken.
My family is so proud right now.


Cookie Rojas- one of the coolest sports names ever.


Rob Deer- watched my cousins shoot and kill the poor thing and then not knowing I was eating it a few weeks later at their house. It tasted awesome.


Pie Traynor- oh pie..how I loathe you! You can try to hide behind your many different flavors but I will never..ever..ever..never like you.


Billy Beane- though your career was quite vanilla, you sure gave us a little fruit when it ended.


Candy Maldanado- as a kid I thought how cool a name that was. As I got a little older I felt bad that he had a strippers name.



the sportsfreak's timer has gone off. Enjoy your "post" game meal!

Mailing In an All Star Game

Watching the 2010 MLB All-Star Game had me seriously thinking if this once fun filled game would ever live up to its billing again. I am sorry to say but Tuesdays game left me with no lasting memory. It was not fun, plain and simple. We had 68 players all with a "just glad to be here" attitude(Yawn). For me, the Allstar game allows me the hope of catching a glimpse of the players letting their guard down and truly enjoying themselves, their family, the fans and even the stadium. Everyone was just a little robotic and had the look of that guy having to work in the office over a holiday weekend.


I will be sending a letter to Major League Baseball with some suggestions on how to make the game a little more interesting for the casual fan.
Let see if they respond(I'll keep you posted)

The Softball Game-
Why don't you just call it as it is? It's an old timers softball game.
Is it me or are the old timers crippled?
Kids running the bases should be the new rule.
The celebs are barely celebs. Jennie Finch? She can stay (she hot and she plays ball)

HR Contest-
Never thought the HR would be as boring as slam dunk. GGGOODD how boring!!!!

Put up Bulls Eye Targets in the stands or on the outfield fences .
Hit it here... we all win a pizza. Yeah!! Make it realistic.. not 575 feet away.

Hitting HR's to all fields should count towards a player total count.

Fan Cam's during the homerun hitting contest. Seeing a fan catching a homerun from his Point of View. Ain't nothing wrong with that.
How about one for the kids shagging flys and bullets on the field. We see some of the close calls but hey WE WANT MORE!


The Game Itself-

If a fan catches a foul ball. That fan would get to meet the player who hit it in the middle of the inning. A quick photo op. (in my sponsor voice.. "brought to you by our friends at Kodak")

The Starting Line-ups should have to come to bat a mandatory 3 times:
Albert Pujols batted once (struck out), played 2 innings and was gone.
Just give me the finger next time Albert.

The Starting Pitchers should face the entire starting line up of the opposing team.
Is asking for him to face 9 guys to much to ask?
My fav pitcher/batter match up: Ron Guidry vs Steve Garvey


The PA Announcers should be mobile
The players bring their kids right? So have the kids introducing their fathers:
"Now batting ...number 4... my daddy!! Hi Daddy !!

or Fans in Concession Line:
"Now batting...a number 2 with fries....Derek McJeter"


The game could have used former Angles like Rod Carew, Brian Downing or Sid Monge to do some fan reporting in the Outfield bleachers. Have the fans ask the managers questions during the game, whatever, just more fan interaction is all I am asking.
Did you get it? Angels in the Outfield. (man that was a good one.)


Wouldn't it have been cooler to have Rod Carew slap an ceremonial opposite field single to left off Jimenez rather than throwing out the games 1st pitch.


Didn't anyone tell the guys at ESPN that Anaheim is not in Los Angeles.
The song We Love LA at the end of the game. That was just wrong.


My headline if Troy Tulowitzki had hit a homer during the game.
"Rockie Rocks a Rocket into the Rocks"



Neither snow, nor rain, nor sleet, nor gloom of game will keep the sportsfreak from delivering.

Sportin' a Stache

As some of you may not know, I am mustache-intolerant..... we can bow our heads if you need some time. But make no mistakes, my milk mustache can not be matched.

The guys at work and I had a conversation about who had/has the coolest mustache in sports. For the record we had no women comment on the subject. My apologies to all the ladies for us not picking your mustached cutie pies.


To start off we give you Hulk Hogan- its weird because when I think of his stache the #20 always come to mind. He was 20 something when I first saw his stache. Over the 20 years its grew to about 20 inches from end to end. It was at least 20 different colors (stayed blond for 25 years)during that time and would rub it 20 times during a match.
I would recognize his mustache if it stood by itself. Now that's a good stache.


On the opposite end of good is Al Hrabosky (MLB pitcher) his stache was a total mess,just like the dudes brain.
The Mad Hungarian nickname fit him well.
The Fu-Manchu style stache not so much.


Steve Prefontaine
We don't see many a runner nowadays sporting a mustache.
Can't remember seeing one in the last 10 years.
The look is downright cool.


Rollie Fingers- wasn't it enough to have one of the most iconic staches in sports? But the dude was a great pitcher as well.
7 Time AS and 3 Time WS winner. Need we say more?


Marc Spitz- alright ladies we are throwing you a bone here.
Dude made hair in the pool a cool thing. His posters were Top Sellers after his Olympic gold heist. Take a breath ladies.


Let's get two thing straight before I go.

A Porn Mustache is COOL


Combing the stache with a little comb is NOT COOL



The sportsfreak home schooled by teacher of the American Mustache Institute

It's All in the Delivery

This past spring while weaving my way through Tiger Stadium in Lakeland I stopped dead in my tracks and looked my enemy straight in the eye. My enemy is the Radar Pitch Machine- you know, throw the ball and it tells you how fast your throw is.
My enemy since childhood, has embarrassed me whenever he's had the chance. He always had plenty of witnesses that's for sure. Who can forget the Cooperstown incident of 1980. I was just 13 years old and rockin' my glove and new hat, I stepped up to the rubber (just a piece of black tape) to dazzle the crowd. I check the invisble runner on first and reach back for my heater, with great accuracy the ball hits the catcher right in the mitt. Waitng on the cheers from the crowd around me I glance at my offical speed of my precious heater. 51 mph. What the f? 51 mph. This can't be, I have smoke coming off my fingers. I throw another. 49 mph. Pissed off I throw my last pitch. 51 mph again. My fans (the attendant and the next kid in line) said I did a good job but the leaderboard showed differently.
My fastest pitch was slower than some 8 year old pitch. Yikes.

Now back to the present day, I fork over my $5 to throw three balls at a Tigers Face. At 42 years old and I'm feeling real good about my upcoming throws. 1st pitch 50 mph, 2nd pitch 48 mph, my 3rd pitch clocked in at 51 mph. To you folk reading that may seem not that all impressive or maybe even sad to another set of you.

For me that throw of 51 mph says that inside this 42 year old's body still lives an ageless 13 year old boy who loves sports.


So I have marveled at some of the truly different approaches to delivering a pitch or ball or whatever that some athletes have taken.

Fernando Valenzuela-
If ever an athlete has said he looks to the lord above to achieve his goals, Fernando gaze to the heavens speaks volumes.
Who didn't love that pudgy screwgie throwing sensation.


Juan Marichal-
He had three arm delivery locations for each of his 4 pitches that I'm sory is a hitters nightmare.
Still to this day, one of the hardest deliveries to imitate playing wiffle ball.
How this man never won a Cy Young Award is a shame.


Kent Tekulve-
The first time I ever saw submarine pitcher.
To me the Dude was weird. He was freakishly tall & skinny, a huge adams apple that you couldn't take your eyes off of and to boot he sported baseball size wad of chaw.
Why he didn't fall down after each pitch is still a mystery to me.


Walter Ray Williams-
Don't know how to bowl? It's easy...watch Walter and copy.
Perfect form, perfect delivery, everytime.
They should honor him with making him the PBA "Logo".
Your welcome PBA exec's.


The Paper Boy- as a prodigal periodical passer, I have executed, many times, the perfect - the up two flight of stairs- over the railing- lean up against the door toss. The euphoric sensation of this accomplishement was always washed away by my next 20 throws nailing the door at 5AM with a loud "THUD!".
So to my delivery boy, rest easy. I have no problem when I find my paper in the bushes or floating in the fountain near the door, I know I'll be the recipient of your perfect toss soon.


Is it me or is it just weird when the pizza delivery guy comes to the door. Are we really that happy to see him? Like he's a long lost friend or a bit more like Santa Claus status. Do you think in pizza delivery training class, when they go to the practice door, they have people screaming "THE PIZZA'S HERE! YES !THE PIZZA'S HERE! That's what we all do right?
I feel bad for the Chinese Food Delivery Guy, he never gets that kind of reaction. Sorry chinese delivery guy.



Brought to you by the sportsfreak

Fooling with Mother Nature

I recently took a road trip from Orlando down to Miami, unfortunately the views are not very scenic for most of the way just lots of trees on both sides of the road. So as I was cruising the Florida Turnpike at the legal speed limit (90 mph in the right lane). I thought (ok day dreamed) how sports and mother nature have partnered to make my (oh ..our) world a brighter place to live.


Without MN's trees we wouldn't have wooden baseball bats. Forget that silly New Years, the first crack of the bat in March is the beginning of my year.


MN has been duped folks. What a shame it is to hear a "ping" instead of a "thwack" on the golf course.


I was always felt different than the normal hockey fans. When the shot hit the goalies post (made of wood) I thought they were yelling "Mother Nature" but I was sadly mistaken.


In baseball you ride the pine, they never tell you that it will give you splinters. Damn you St. Margaret's home team bench. Oh God..oops..sorry about damning you.


MN gave basketball and us Tree(Rollins). Merry Christmas!


Which pitch has the most names? Is it called a Gopher ball, an Ether ball or the La Lob? I call it the Palm Ball.


I am going to start the "I hate the Fn Cactus League". The Grapefruit League rules.
Enjoy your dry heat suckers.


When I was 7 years old, I never, ever knew a person could be named Wilbur (Wood).
I still have his baseball card.


Could they come up with another name in Ladies Gymnastics for making a perfect landing? It's doesn't sound so lady like to have to STICK a landing.


Log Rolling could never be without MN. I got nothing else folks.


MN would not be too proud of the OAK Hills High School team or as it should be called, the NBA's Minor League Team.


Did you know that both the NFL and the MLB had a player named Branch (Cliff and Rickey). Now you have a trivia answer. How lucky are you?!


you know what else has been made special by MN for the sportsfreak, the speeding ticket I got while daydreaming.

Life is good.

Be vewwy vewwy quiet!!

How many ways have been told, been asked, been shown or felt how to be quiet in our lives? We all have memories of our Moms or Dads telling us to shush or use our inside voice. We've seen Mom's legendary finger to mouth silent shut up signal at Aunt Isabels house after you were kicking your sisters under the table. As most kids born before PS's, we've felt how the "hand of god" (ok Dad' hand) kept us quiet in car.

Why is silence golden? We have to be quiet a least a few times a day and in some very specific situations. Maybe there is some top secret Silence Program that the gov't in still testing. I think its held in Area SHHHH.

Please let me get your feedback ( no yelling please) about my Top 7 Quiet Zones.

#1- The Elevator- I think there is a decible alarm in the elevator that we are not aware of and it only goes off if you speak. Talk above whisper? a tornado alarm blasts you into silence! Maybe we are subliminally just afraid of the alarm.
If you walk in the elevator and immediately turn your back to the door, the other occupants will do the same. Try it. Gauranteed it'll work
My elevator at work says it can fit 23 people? Maybe 23 babies piled on top of each other, but not people.


#2 The Doctors Office- here's what everyone in the Dr's office waiting room is thinking to each other. "What wrong with you?" "Nothing, what's wrong with you". "Nothing, what's wrong with you." "Nothing, What's wrong with you."
If you talk to the other people waiting are we going to catch what horrible disease they have?
After the doctor has made you feel better I come out and then I have to pass all the sick people on the way out. I hold my breath and double time it out of the office because I might get sick from the sick people breathing. Sounds dumb? But I have never been sick after returning from the doctors.


#3- Airplane- can we get any closer to a human being without actually acknowledging them?
Maybe I should just hand one of the hotels "Do Not Disturb" signs around my neck, or slap on one of those "Hello My Name is (I don't give a shit) stickers on my shirt.
I only fly SU Airlines. Figure it out.


#4 Movie Theatre- silence right before the feature movie comes on allows you to hear how many peple chew with their mouths open. So many people inhaling popcorn at the same time is a weird sound, like being on a farm at feeding time.
How cool is it not to have decide who gets the arms rest just by looking at the person next to you. It's simple folks, the right arm rest is your domain. All your lefties should only sit in the first seat in the row, on the left, when facing the screen. The attendant can direct to your assigned seat if you haven't figured it out yet.


#5- The Upper Deck at any stadium in the 9th innning.
You can hear your own heartbeat at Trop field.
How quiet you ask? You and your loved one can do "it" up there.


#6 The Mens Bathroom -Hey! eyes straight ahead douchebag. Like the police, "keep moving along, nothing to see her folks keep moving."
Even a "how you doing" is not allowed.


#7 Golf- because we are not allowed to say anything above a whisper it would make me feel better if you could hold up signs with lots of exclamation points.
Its in the hole!!! Shank this tiger!!!
Why do WE whisper when WE are on the golf course? You do it. Stupid, right?
Who needs quiet, I'd play golf in traffic if I could.



the sportsfreak has "not" spoken.

Getting Jumpy

Today was one of those days were I had an extra spring in my step. Leaving the house, I grabbed both garbage cans from the curb his morning instead of the standard two trips back to the garage. (I know your impressed) I threw the basketball in the back of the car for whatever reason. Is a game break out while sitting in traffic on I-4? I took the stairs, three flights of them to the office, taking two, sometimes three steps at a time. So what if I was out of breath walking in to the office. What?
I was jumping for the first time in two months. My Doc said it was ok. It was like , well I imagine, it may have been like walking on the moon. I had some good hang time between some of those steps.


Some memorable moments in life and sports as well have been accompanied by a good jump or two. We all have our favorites. Here are a few of mine. So let's jump right to it.


I can never get tired of seeing a catcher jump into a pitcher grasp after a great victory. Yogi-Don Larsen always comes to mind. For once I'd like to see the pitcher throw himself into the catchers arms.


Imagine this eight year old kid watching the Acapulco Cliff Divers (Wide World of Sports)for the first time. It was unreal. Were those guys really going to jump off cliffs? My god, how are they going to miss those jagged rocks? Why did they stand on the tiniest, littlest piece of rock to jump from?


The Frog Jumping Contest (That's Incredible) always made me scratch my head.
Not at the mere fact of rewarding a frog for jumping but at the people trying to make the frog jump.
Not sure the frog is going to mimic the moronic human jumping around like a frog.
Why not just use a magnifying glass to mak'em jump, like we did when we were kids?

Pack it up, pack it in. Let me begin. I came to win. Battle me that's a sin. I won't tear the sack up. Punk you'd better back up ...
Didn't we all just jump around to that entire song. This was a song from god for all us drunk guys who couldn't bust a move.

Can anybody tell me why a guy can't just run into the end zone any more? Why does the act of scoring make it justifiable to throw themselves airborne into the end zone. Keep it on the ground morons. I keep waiting for the idiot who paralyzes himself trying to be cool. It will happen. Breaking news you've heard here first.


Three rules to stage jumping.
One- people don't care wear they grab to catch you.
Two- people lie when they say they'll catch you.
Three- It is awesome!


How can nailing a stalefish or a half cab not be totally gnarly.
The dudes are grabbing some sick air lately.


Poor pathetic Martin Gramatica- only a kicker could hurt himself that way.


Most of us wish to be a sports star in one sport. How great would it be if you were good enought to play two. My favorite "two timing" athletes are Bo Jackson, Deion Sanders, Danny Ainge.




Thanks for hangin' with the sportsfreak.

What's Next?

I have many questions and am not sure if they can all be answered in my lifetime.
I am waiting for the next giant leap in sports history. Something that has never happened before nor been seen. I'm a looking for the Jim Beamon type of moment. His jump was truly a giant leap in sports.

Maybe the question that really needs to be asked is
Has the human body reached its performance limits in sports in which we play?


Dunking a basketball is a prerequisite in the NBA. So why are we so bored with the slam Dunk contest? Players have been able to jump about the same height for the last 40 years. So what can it be, have we physically run of ways to dunk the ball?


We have MLB pitchers who can throw 100 miles an hour. We had them for the past 30 years. Do we have radar gun problem? Maybe that's a little far fetched but I am looking for the possibility for a ball player to throw 105, 110 or even 115 mph?

Sidd Finch are you out there? !!!


Can our track athletes run faster?
We have seen the amazing feats of Usain Bolt and how those events caught the attention of the entire world. In his events measured in thousandths of seconds his performance was great, but if he had taken full seconds off the record we would have sports insanity.


As fast as we a can run now, will there ever be a 3 minute miler?
It has taken us 100 years to lower the mile record from 4 min 14 sec to 3 min 43 sec. Not exactly amazing.


Why can't the worlds best leapers jump higher than 8 feet? It has been almost 20 years since someone (Javier Sotomayer) has.


What's the big deal about rushing for 2,000 yards? It happened in first 1973 and then in the next 37 years, 5 more players reached it. Hey NFL is that all you got, I am waiting for the first one to runs for 2500 yards or even 3000 yards.




We've had more than our share of records for the most whatevers scored on a Tuesday night, when leading by at least 3, with 26 minutes left to play, while playing its
6th straight game on the road.

Plain and simple,
I just want a record to be set and it have some old fashion substance.





The sportsfreak is history.

Should I Stay or Should I Go ?

These times.. they are a changing.
It used to be that you'd live and die with your team.
Your starting QB gos down in the 1st week?
You stared rooting for the back up -ol' whatshisname

In today's (1986?), Janet Jackson's "What have you done for me lately" world, we faithful are turning our backs on our teams in record time.

We are not talking a year of suffering, not even an incident (murder, drugs, PED's) catch our attention any longer. All it takes now is just takes one bad game and we are ready to throw our team/player under the bus.
This is what I heard from a Cav's fan after losing their final game
"HEY LEBRON THANKS FOR NOTHING, PLEASE DON'T GO, GO AHEAD LEAVE US, YOUR A BUM, WE LOVE YOU.") 15 seconds and you got 5 changes of heart. That's what being a sports fan has become? How sad.

How did we get to this point? Who has led the charge?
Was it the players leading us down this road?

Most players truly care about the game and the fans, but some could simply care less (FU - Joe Johnson)

Is it about money?
Being priced out of most stadiums hurts, welcome to the upper,upper,roof top deck, Mr. Average Joe.

Is it the players who are given too much money? "That stiff is making $13 mil to sit the bench"

Is it about the disconnect with players?
Try getting an autograph? haha- players security personnel is there to keep you from "annoying" YOUR hero.



Can we change this ugly trend? Probably
How? Stop overreacting sports freaks! All I can say is "relax playa".

In this world of I want it yesterday. With everything being forced down our throat. If you don't slow down , you going to miss some great things.
Before you throw out your history with your teams. Give yourself a moment.
You will never forgive yourself if you don't.
I can only use the past as my way to change.
You can look at moments in time that keep you coming back to the game, players, teams you love. It may have been just a moment that has stuck with you forever.

Like running into Walt Frazier outside MSG and him asking if I want to share a cab uptown.

Hearing Bill Walton laugh when I joked about Louis Orr's physique.


Having Cal Ripken Jr. playfully calling A-Rod to come over to give an autograph to this guys wife who thinks he has beautiful eyes.


Being a 14 year old kid, eating Chinese food with Marty Lyons of the Jets Sack Exchange.


Seeing Tom Seaver in the City and instantly going mute right in front of him.
Is that how I got my name sportsfreak?


Deliriously running around in the parking lot with my friends after listening to Mookie Wilson's roller go through Bill Buckner legs.


You all have these memories, You all have moments to keep you going. This is what make you that fan of your team or want to be like your hero. Look back on them with respect.

Are you ready to give up those future memories just because you team lost 24 hours ago?
I hope for all our sakes you don't.



The sportsfreak will root, root, root for the home team and if they don't win its a shame. No worries, I'll still be there for the next game.

That Smarts!

As I get ready to revisit my Doctor for an update on my injured goofy foot. I am reminded once again how much pain is associated with the sports I love. Almost all my injuries have come by way of sports. I had some teeth knocked out playing hockey, broken ankles playing basketball, broken nose playing baseball (I see a bright light)
broken some knuckles bowling (good luck figuring that one out) and an arm and wrist broken playing football.
A quick shout out to my sister Jen- she's the one who gave me the distinct honor of having a few stitches in my tongue.(jyur in tha bwlog, jyew havvy nowvv?)

So there you have it, I may not be on the level of Evil Knievel but I am only 42 and can't see myself slowing down any time soon.

Some sports injuries you just can't seem coming, your more than likely to feel them coming.


Horse racing seems like a gentle sport, but as soon a as horse decides he's had enough of the dude whipping him, he'll throw that throw jockey not just off to the side but right in front of him and the other horses. Like the trampling will do the jockey some good.
Whip it good!

One of the rare times I cried while watching a sporting event was when I witnessed Derek Redmond pull up lame on the track and his Pops ran on to the track and supported his limping son around the track. Redmond was in such pain. But nothing would keep him from finishing his olympic race.
Tissue please.


Nothing is as matter of fact as getting hit by a baseball pitch. You have all you focus on hitting the ball. Not the other way around. You have 1.4 second to react but most of the time when you do get hit, there is no reaction. You just have to take it. In the back, the arm (thanks Kenny M) or even the buttocks. Yes your buttocks bruise just as easy. Maybe Barry Bonds had the right idea. Pad yourself like a football player and your all set.


NFL players have become a generation of concussion zombies. Never in the history of sport has the governing body fully admitted that they have a problem.
A message to the NFL- you have a problem.


Did you know 95% of Hockey players who played in the 1980-1999 have lost at least one of their teeth playing the game. I too have have lost a few toofs.
Smile for the camera boys.


Drag Racing: I loved eating fire balls when I was a kid. Cringe when I see one on the track. Let's be honest, we don't necessarily want them to crash, but we are mesmerized when they do.


Toughest injury to view had to be a baseball player, Moises Alou breaking his leg while running the bases. The sudden sickening feeling in the pit of your stomach, the aversion to watch the replay, the helplessness of the runner laying there.
Make it stop, MAKE IT STOP!


To all the soccer player "Please stop faking your injuries". This is the most corrupt sport (The NBA is closing in fast) when it comes to "real " injuries.
Sorry Soccer, I'm just keeping it real.




The sportsfreak says "Take Care"

How do you like your beatings?

Run'em up or keepin it close. There have been many a debate about whether sportsmanship is taking place in our sports universe. I feel that sportsmanship comes in many shapes and sizes. If you play a game, someone will win and someone will lose. I think that over the years people have forgotten about that. No one is going to go mental if they get beat in little league by a score of 55-3, we didn't care about the score, we just wanted the ice cream after the game. Sometimes we'd be at the same ice cream shop with the other team kids. There were no brawls that I can recall.

We've all seen the classic beat downs.
We all have our fav's and our not so fav's.
So whatever your view on this. Always remember, it is just a game.


If you wound up on the wrong end of a 77-0 football game. Sorry to you.
But if your in it for a big pay day against the big boys, you got take your lumps.


I'm not for a BB team scoring 212 points. There can be some sportsmanship.
Just Stall Baby Stall. Be a sport. So instead you win 154 to 11.
Live with it.


Is scoring 20 runs in a MLB game too much or are just you a nancy boy?
You can't sub for the subs sub right?
When you put your bat boy into pitch because your so far ahead, don't feel bad for the other team.


Tennis is so nice. You just got beat love love and love. Man don't feel bad, you got three times more love today than yesterday. Plus you got bagels for the next three days.


Hockey is more entertaining for fans when the score is run up. Sad but true.
Questions I need answered.
How many times can goalie be taken out and put back in?
Who's our 5th line goalie?



Gotta say that a route in soccer is not very exciting.
Give me a nil nil game anytime
If a route is on, can you use the kids you held hands with while walking onto the field as your sub?
FIFA alert! Mandatory goalie pull if a team is too far in the lead.


Ok you cowboys are just plain nuts . Your sport is a beating itself.
If you go easy, your getting you head stomped in 1.2 seconds.
Props to you tough guy!


My worst sportsmanship moment:
I was 12, playing in a indoor tennis tournament. I was not playing too well against a kid I thought I should have been beating. I got so mad after missing one point I whipped my racket across the court.(Hi Johnny Mac). To make matter worse I lost the next point and whipped it again even further across the court. Man was I bent.
The kid continued to beat me and I ultimately lost.
I, being of sound mind, then went to the net and didn't shake the kids hand.
I don't know where that kid is now, but to him I say "I am sorry."



The sportsfreak says if you must whip it....whip it good!

Ball Boys Ball Girls

I was watching the Rays game the other days and a foul ball was hit and only for the grace of god did the ball not hit the ball girl sitting in foul territory.
Now, I get the idea of the ball girl and the reason they are there.
You know how it goes.
Foul Ball + cute kid + TV cameras = The WORLD is good.
In reality, what does this ballperson do for the sport, are they really an integral part of the game. Ok class, let discuss.

In Baseball they are called ball persons. I have seen many a good catch of a screaming grounder and some just down right, eyes closed, please go in my glove attempts. My favorites are those stupid fair balls that the ball person interferes with and then gives that sheepish grin like they had no idea that a ball could ever be hit fair.

Maybe MLB can do a reality show of sorts. My idea is allow fans to be ball persons. It could be a random pick every night. Imagine sitting is your upperdeck/box seat and getting asked by an usher if you want to be on the field covering the third base line territory. You get a jersey or maybe you have to wear catchers protective gear.
How cool would that be.
Other ideas:
Have the DH be the ball person. What else does he have to do, right?

Fan/Public vote for their celebrity ball person. Up next: Megan Fox!

Invite little league team to the game: Surprise (18) little dudes with that!

Real or Not real you make the call
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1liNz3QsAc&feature=fvw


In Tennis they are called ball boys/girls. As far as I am conerned they play a pivotal role during the whole match, unfortunately some of things they have to do are gross or cruel.
Who would want to be the towel giver-holder? Pretty nasty.
Some plastic glove please.

A human target is not what I think they signed up for.
For years they were not allowed to move away from the ball.
PROTECT YOURSELF!!

The Master's in Madrid has it right: Runaway Models are the ball girls. Nice.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xyJnlH0L-4

Ball Boy Tryouts at the US Open are in June. Wish me luck.


In Basketball they are called the sweat mop up dudes. Need I say more.




May your balls always be foul.
The sportsfreak has spoken.

Eating Dirt

As some of you already know, I took a header of my skateboard and ate some dirt. Something I was all too familiar with during my childhood. As I laid there going through my body checklist to making sure everything was still attached it got me thinking about how dirt has played an important role in my sporting life.

I remember the park on Rose Place, where the neighborhood kids and I played every conceivable sport. It was half block long on a slant and it was rocky on the top half and a little less rocky with some soft(beach)sand at one end and hard red clay at the other plus a big ditch at the bottom on the other half. You can see it right?
There I remember my first scissor slide into 2nd base. Rounding first and thinking I could beat Lenny's throw to second was my thought, well Lenny comes up throwing a dart and I really didn't plan on sliding, so I was caught a little in between, should I dive? slide? not slide? I planted my left foot into the soft sand and it gave way for my leg not to snap in half and my body just fell into a natural scissor slide my right toe catching the side of the bag. Just like I had seen so many times on the old reels of baseball films.
To this day I always think about my perfect slide.

"Dirt" plays a pivotal role in many sports and some others it's just dirt. These are some that I thought of.

Beach Volleyball-
Funny how a little sweat and little sand turns your skin into sandpaper.

Horse Racing
The mudders were the best. Down the stretch they come, everyone's colorful uniforms covered in mud. They should have put cameras in the goggles of those jockeys.

Baseball
I can't forget Mookie Wilson stealing second base, it was at Shea in August 83.
I had never seen so much cloudy dirt in the air.

Rainy Football Game
Besides a snow game these are the most entertaining games ever. You are sure to see something happen on the field you have never seen before .
Here's to NFL Films and the super slow motion camera.

Baseball mound
This is sacred territory for the pitchers and a mine field for everyone else.
Who hasn't seen a third baseman trip over the mound trying to catch a pop up?

Soccer Pitch-
Why is that in every Mexican soccer game I ever saw the goalies area is beat to crap. The rest of the field is a beautiful meadow of green and the goalies stood in mud puddles.

Hockey
Is just a dirty sport. They hit you with sticks.


My favorite Dirty things:

Movie: The Sand Lot

Song: Enter the Sandman

Musician: Muddy Waters

Sport: Mud Wrestling

ESPN Telecast: Mud Bog Racing

Baseball Player: Sandy Koufax

Football Player: Barry Sanders

Basketball Player: Dirk (that's pretty close) Nowitzki

Cartoon Character: Pig Pen

Nickname given to me by my brother Mike: Dirt


I wash my hands of you!
the sportsfreak

The Baseball Dance

A shout out to all you wedding party dancing machines.

The Baseball Cha Cha Song

All right y'all clap it up.
tug to the right, tug to the left, straighten out whats down below, one hop into the box and hit. Real smooth.

Every body clap your hands. clap, clap, clap clap clap clap clap

wrist bands straight? Let's go
Helmet fits right? Let's Go.
Looking Good, Check it out.
Can you be clean down low, tap your cleats to the right, tap your cleats to the left.
Sliiiiide your bat between your legs! Its nice and clean.

Your need a hit. Plant right foot in,left foot in.. you sure?.
He come the pitch . You've hit a scorcher to short.
Left, right, left, right, left, your diggin' to first, the throw is on its way. sllliiddeee into first...head first. Your safe!


No please... a standing ovation is not necessary.



Here's and oldy but a goody says a five year old.

You put your starter in...you take your starter out...you put your starter in and
you hope he lasts six inning before you take him out.
You do the Pitchers Pokey and turn your rotation around and that's all the managers think about.

You put you middle relief in... your take your middle relief out...
you put your middle relief in and you pray he gets you 6 outs.
You do the Pitcher Pokey and turn your rotation around and that's all the managers think about.

You put you setup guy in... you take your set up guy out... you put your set up guy in and hope he pitches lights out.
You do the Pitchers Pokey and turn your rotation around and that's all the managers think about.

You put your Closer in... you take your closer out... you put your closer in and your sure he'll close it out.
You do the Pitcher Pokey and turn your rotation around and all the while the manager had no doubt.



Catch my next show in Vegas.
The sportsfreak has sung with the fat lady.

You Are What You Wore

Styles come and Styles go and in the world of sports that continues to ring true.
We all have that one sports picture of us, not the flattering one, that showcases our sense (or lack ) of style that has left mark on us forever . You know the pic, the one with ball cap that looks like it is 12 inched tall, The shot of you playing hoops in those gold Chuck Taylors with black socks. Yeah that's the one.

Well the Pro's are no different, I am sure they cringe when the look back to some of the choices they have made or have forced upon them.


Swim Suits have gone the way of little teeny tiny Speedos to a one piece version with fish scales sewn into them. The sport used to be very manly(Marc Spitz) now I can't tell the difference between a man or woman. Please go easy on the swim caps, way too tight. What do you say we bring back frilly ladies caps. They were all the rage at the swim club in the seventies.

Hoop shorts 1970's nothing to the imagination style or Fab 5 trash bags?
Can't we find a happy medium guys.
Girls.. the shorter the better. Nothing worse that seeing a uni hanging to a girls calves.

Baseball unis- Baggy was best. Late 70's Cincinnati Reds were the neatest even with Pete Rose on the team. They sported the belts and everything.
Today.. Felix Unger needs to be in charge of the uni's.

Volleyball players in the beginning sported popular neon tanks. Hey, they matched your sunscreen on your nose.
Nowadays the boys and girls are playing the sport almost naked. You gotta love a sport where the uni is so small the endorsements have to be spray painted to the athletes bodies. I can dig it!

Track athletes have figured out that Less = More. The less they wear, the more fast they run (I know I know, speak English Ray). I love the change over from the Mary Decker frumpy wear to the Flo-Jo- leotard. But it still hurts my head from seeing Carl Lewis wearing a blue jump suit leotard stretchy job.
Extra Note to all track guys, No midriff should be showing when in uni. You can showcase your ten pack abs after the race.

Hockey Pads have transformed Goalies looking like robots to real Stretch Armstrongs.
In what sport does your uni look better with blood on it.
Hockey jerseys are the most unflattering piece of clothing to wear. Prove me wrong.

I am a big fan of the NFL having the strictest uni rules in all of sports.
They even have a towel fine if you towel is too long? Play by the rules Big Boys.

Tennis has gone from long white pants and shirts to white shorts and white dresses (fav Chris Evert) then into some warped kaleidoscope of colors that even you couldn't have imagined while on shrooms. I give a (punch you in the head) Thank You to Andre Agassi. You started it and now we can't stop it. Cat suit? Capris? Fashion statement or not? You decide. I'll keep my eyes closed.



Here's to the all the sportsfreaks sporting jorts and mesh half shirts.
My eyes are burning!!!!

Opening Day....Finally!

Opening Day is here at last.
For some, last years heartache can be forgotten.
For others, it's a new year (at that right Cubbie fans?)

See ya soon March Madness, we will miss you but not as much as I as I missed my boys of summer.

Batter Up! Yanks-RedSox: Love the match up.
On Sunday Night- Not so much.
Monday day games are the real start. Some things don't need to be changed.

Let's play two is not enough.
How about 13 games of pure joy in one day?
Work? forget about it. I'm Half-daying it. How bout you?


We get to hear the National Anthem played 13 times.
Take Me Out to the ballgame too.
God does love me.

Can't wait until I see the first player run out a triple.

Predictions, forecast, premonitions, good calls or bad calls for us to ponder.

Will we be bitten by the injury bug this year?

Which rookie will surprise us all?

Can the Pirates break .500?

Will people continue to pay $2500 for a seat at Yankees Stadium. When does the buy one get one free sale begin?

Can the Marlins draw a crowd of less than 1,000 again? The Marlins still play in the majors right?

Not sure how I feel about instant replay yet.

Go Rays- only because they have the same name as me. It get's me in the game free one time a year.

Will the Cardinals hit the most home runs this year? "help" from McGwire, I'm just saying.

Here's to hearing Ronan & Bob in the Bronx and Vin on the left coast.

May the RedSox lose 121 games.
May the Dodgers one and done star strike out 250 times(not naming names)
Sorry but the Pirates and Marlins will again go down in flames.
Yankees Win #28 is surely a headline I will frame.

Looking forward to a Dodger Dog, A Schimtters in Philly,
an Ichirroll and a Sonoran Dog in SD. Delicious!!!


Is it ok to cry on Opening Day?



At least for one day all will be right in the sportsfreaks world.

PLAY BALL!

Guy from Jersey

The sports jersey has taken on a few different meanings as I take a ride on my sports journey. There seems to be jersey phenomenon going on that I am not quite sure if I should join or just be afraid of. Just last week at the supermarket I saw a grandma wearing a Lakers Jersey, Kobes no less. Since when has it become popular with Nana and Papa to wear what the kids are wearing.
I have owned just one jersey in my life. Congratulations to ESPN. Your were the chosen one. Not that I didn't want to wear the Magics, Bird, Jordan , Jackson's or Gretzky jersey. Just never really needed one that bad.

There a few reasons that I kind of shied a away from the Jersey thing. My first was a crazy superstition that if I bought say a Michael Jordan jersey, he would get traded the very next day. I know it was weird, but remember I am a sportsfreak. Who knew he might even retire.. to play baseball (stupid Whitesox jersey ) or unretire with a new number (#55 really?) and/or play for another team (The Wizards, should've stayed the Bullets). So how many vintage one of kind Jordan jersey's would I have now. You get the point.

Some do it just to change their image..wait ..all of them do it to change their image. We are talking about changing their jersey number. My mom would wash my mouth out with soap if I wrote what I think of that. Kobe, past # 8 present #24 did it to make every one forget his rape , sorry his alleged rape. Sorry Kobe not everyone has forgotten. The worst part is the NBA doesn't even care. Kobe "8" jersey sales were tops every year. People in other countries had his jersey. Why would the NBA allow him to change the number. We associated #8 with Kobe, no one else. Now who wears the # 8 jersey? I'll give you a million bucks if you can.
We now have Lebron James who wants to change his jersey number from 23 to 6. I honor of the greatest player James knew.. Michael Jordan. Nice gesture but a slap in the face to Bill Russell. Did he forget that basketball was played before 1984? WTF is everyone going to do with their #23 jersey. You wouldn't be caught dead at the arena with an old, ratty, clearance bin #23 James jersey would you?
Come on NBA have a backbone on this one.

Major League baseball has gotten it right. Teams can retire numbers as they see fit. The Ring of Fame, the Outfield Wall, the Monument Parks. Each stadium has their own unique way of honoring their hometown stars.
Baseball itself has showed honor and respect to Jackie Robinson's #42.

How to create fan loyalty for your program. Create 480 jersey combinations for your fans to choose from. Thank you Oregon for going out on the deep end. Here is my version of a Ducks fan in their bedroom on Saturday morning.
Should I wear the home or away jersey today. That cuts it down to 240 choices.
Do I feel the green or black or white or yellow one matches my jeans today. OK, now only 60 choices.
Did they say it was going to a "stripe out" at the stadium? Horizontal? vertical? animal? Just 20 left.
Cotton or polyester? 10 left.
Short or Long sleeve? 5 left.
Numbers or no numbers number. 2 left.
Names or no name?
I GOT THAT ONE.. finally!!!


Mad love to everyone who sports a jersey of the player they once loved to watch play. From the big stars (Stan Musial, Hank Aaron, Joe Namath) to the cup of coffee players (my favs are Wesley Walker, Kevin Maas and Rennie Stennett.


The sportsfeak will always be stylin"

Anticipation

We have all spent a few hours watching our favorite sport. Sometimes we have the television on just for background noise and others times it is to scrutinize events happening every 5 seconds. But there comes a time in every sport that capture the heat of the moment..the time to check one's self... the second that has everyone waiting in anticipation that will decide the final result. This exact moment has us feeling many diiferent types of emotions,depending on which team /sport you are rooting for/against. This moment in sport is usually declared by one sentence that draws us in. I've listed a few of my favorites below. I hope they are some of your as well.



"It's a high fly ball, deep to right....."
Visions of Chris Chambliss and Kirk Gibson always come to my mind when I here this.


"He breaks the tackle, he is at the 40,the 30,the 20,the 10...."
Why do I always end up standing in the middle my living room, heaving out of breath like I was just running with the guy.


"Down the stretch they come...."
I watch 3 races (the Triple Crown) every year. But I would watch a hundred more races if I heard those words. The networks have never figured this out.
Shout out to the Zombies at OTB.


"He shoots!! He..."
Thank you for all those buzzer beaters. MJ, Reggie (I still hate you) and most of all me. I can't tell you how many times I hit the game winning shot in my mind by throwing a piece of paper into the trash bin or my milk carton in the the garbage.


"The kick!! He..."
All I can say is GGGGOOOOAAAALLLL!


"The Bell lap (DING DING)"
The Wanamaker Mile at MSG, RUN Eammon Coglin RUN!


"Match Point"
Can it get any quieter at a Tennis Match?


"He needs 9 pins to win, it's in the pocket...."
Don't think I'm kidding, your palms are sweaty , your feeling weak in the knees, the ball suddenly weighs 100lbs, why is he lane so skinny? There's as much pressure as in any sport.


"And now for her dismount...."
Knowing that all her training has ultimately come down to her jumping off a piece of wood 4" wide, then turning 2.5 twists and and 1.5 somersualt in mid air while landing as soft as a feather. That, truly deserves my attention.


"Save and a Beauty...."
The Hockey puck is so hard to see, this is usually when I wait for the instant replay to realize exactly what I thought I think I saw. I think.


"He rounds third and heading for home, here comes the throw, he slides...."
I once pushed my Mom out of the way to see a Red Sock get thrown out at home.
Hey, it was a Red Sock. Sorry Mom.



"I'll write again soon..."
Keep reading the sportsfreak

That's Just Odd

At any NBA arena, the players bench consists of ordinary folding chairs. They are good for you and me, but being 6'10" 260 that's just odd.


Every four years you hear a cowbell at a winter sporting event. Its a very cool sound that all seem to enjoy. Why not anywhere else? that's just odd.


Why is it at a game, that you have throw back a ball that goes out of bounds only if the ball is bigger than your hand? Soccer, basketball, football,volleyball. But if its smaller you can keep it. Tennis, baseball, hockey..That's just odd.


Baseball is the only sport of the big four that does not have cheerleaders?
That's just odd. Plus unfair to us baseball fans.


Who the hell designs the Speed Skaters uniforms? I though I was on shrooms when I was watching them. That look is just odd.


We are fans. sometimes we are stupid. Case in point: why else would we be happy (no wait.. honored) that a 7 foot 275 lbs sweaty, stinky player lands on us trying to save a ball from going out of bounds. That's just odd.


Don't the camera guys know by now that on a breakaway, the player is always going to fall into them. Then they seems surprised (and honored) when they do.
Is that really the best spot to be set up? That's just odd.


Why is going to a spring training basball game quieter than going to a wake?
Even the ushers are quiet. That's just odd.


Is it me or does cotton candy only come in colors red and blue? That's just odd.



Good night Felix and Oscar,
TSF

Here Comes the Band

Sounds plays a very big part in all sporting events, some more than others. Fans making noise can be a distraction to a team or keep a team pumped up.
Sports fans can distinctly tell what type of sporting event is on the tube by just listening to the crowd. Jim, I can name that sport in two seconds.

We all have a specials sounds at the park/stadium/field. Here are few, that are music to my ears.

The most distinct sound to me in any sport is the cow bell. I can flashback to my earliest years watching the Wide World of Sports, in Austria, for the men's downhill skiing. The cowbells are still ringing in my head. I would never watch skiing unless there was plenty of cowbell.


I love to hear a drum at any sporting event. There was a guy at Shea Stadium who always used to bang his drum to get the crowd into the game. Nothing special, just loud enough to get us going. Or Just seeing the band's bass drum players hauling ass around the field during the halftime show. Now that was athletic.


I never listened to the kid across the street practice his trumpet 90 minutes straight. So why would I want to hear 50,000 fan attempt to play while I am watching a soccer match. I have nothing else to say about that.


What sound can be more emotional for an athlete than the ringing of the bell at a boxing bout? Before the first bell they are preparing ,finalizing, motivated, getting psyched up. Ding Ding!!(GRYS Apollo). I Pity the fool who catches the right cross on his chin. He may be thinking to himself "when is the bell ending the round going to ring?". When that bell finally does ring. It a minute of cool down and then a minute to get back into fight mode. The fighters go through this 30 times in 10 rounds. Whew! I'm tired just writing about it.

High school sports fans are different breed. Remember that money was something not all of us had in school. High sports fans are more apt to use the traditional Foot Stomp on the bleachers and their rolled up paper/book for instant megaphones. Simple yet effective.


Girls love to get whistled at. Sports guys don't. Whistles in sports are usually not a good thing. Here are a few situations in which a whistle is heard during game. The whistle in football starts the game. The whistles shining (and they do) moments are the penalties. Whistles like hockey penalties too.
Tennis has whistlers as well. Those laid back tennis fans use it as a way to voice their displeasure when a player questions a call and starts arguing with the chair. Do we think the whistling will make the umpires ears bleed until they change the call?
Lets not make the whistle a totally negative thing. A whistle starts a parade!!!! Who doesn't love a parade!!!

Nowadays we have the most irritating, machine created, noise makers in history.
I am talking about the "Thunder Sticks". Come on America!!! Have we become so lazy that it is just too much work to clap our own hands.
Just sing it with me" clap your hands everybody and everybody just clap your hands"


do re mi fa so la ti do ....it the sportsfreaks time to go.